Three More Hixons

WE ARE HOME!!!

2008-07-23T22:09:00.000-07:00

Sorry to be slow.....ok, only one day slow! We arrived home last night about 9:00 p.m. WITH Marie Vierge and Berto! THEY did great! Berto was a bit anxious about the airplane but we fixed that with some M&M's! So, with each flight (three all together) we took off with M&M's and all was well! In the pictures you can see Marie biting her fingernails before we got on the plane too.......I guess her daddy will have to teach her how to kick that habit.

We arrived in Haiti on Sunday morning. Our flight was delayed one hour. Our flight getting into Miami the night before was delayed two hours so we ended up paying $122 bucks to sleep for less than two hours Sat. night.......oh well, better than sleeping in the Miami airport! So, we were kind of zombies on Sunday......but that was ok!

We went to church and met the kids! They were a bit quiet - which is normal for them. They seem to be very reserved around other people. After church the smiles came freely from both of them!!! We stayed at Auberge du Quebec on Sunday. We had our friend Spencer make a reservation for us while we were in Chicago at CHA! Thank goodness for friends who speak french! He was even able to arrange for us to have one of the newer rooms! The minute we got to the room the kids started to undress......they wanted to go swimming! So - off to the pool for a swim! Of course, first we ordered our lunch because the restaurant needs at least an hour to prepare spaghetti! After lunch - Mark slept and I played with the kids.....we had fun blowing bubbles and coloring. Later that evening we met up with Kate and her children and had dinner.

Monday a.m. we all packed into the van.....Kate, her teenage daughter traveling with her, her 5 children she is adopting and Mark, me, Marie and Roberto all in the back of the van WITH all our luggage.......off on a wild ride that puts Mr. Toad's ride to shame.........John Henry sure knows how to drive and fast on some pretty beat up roads!

After Kate was dropped off at the airport - we met Mansour (the orphanage director for Holt) and he took us out to the Holt Fontana village. We visited for a bit, snapped a few pictures then went over to the Kaliko so we would'nt miss lunch. The Kaliko was nice for swimming, throwing rocks in the ocean and having a nice dinner with Mansour. It was wonderful to visit again......and yes, I kept an eye out for evil Haitian officials! Thank goodness we didn't encounter any creeps this time!

Tuesday a.m. we were up at 4:45 and out the door to the airport by 5:15 a.m. The hour plus drive to the airport was filled with images of Haiti and its people. Images I don't expect to find in America. Those images can be defined as beautiful, sad, funny, completely heartwrenching, encouraging, overwhelming, painful, full of hope, nerve wracking (although the image of a bus blarring its horn coming straight for us - on OUR side of the road didn't raise my heartrate this time) ...all of this and more can be found in a one hour drive to the airport! Haiti has some of the most remarkable people who find joy in their world - a world I would struggle to survive in. I am lucky to have the privilege of my experience in Haiti and of the many fine examples of determination - even if it is found in a split second from an image of a young boy on the street as we race by. Mark and I decided for sure, horns are equal to engines for every vehicle driving the roads in Haiti! You can't be without one!

We arrived plenty early for our flight and three guys "helped" us *HAUL* our three bags in. WOW.....that only cost us $20. Neither one of us was up for arguing so we gave 'em twenty bucks and stood in line where another guy pulled our cart under the rope and put our bags on the scale and yep......he needed a tip too. I have never experienced an airport quite like the one in Port au Prince!
We made it through without any one giving us grief and I was happy about that. I was so happy just to get on that plane! Arriving in Miami was easy! We made it through immigration in 20 minutes and our little ones are now Americans!!! Gotta love that IR3 visa! (NOW that we have it!) Of course, we did have to re-check our luggage, go thru security again and walk to the farthest possible gate.......and then stand in a long line for seat assignments......but I will take that kind of stress anyday! WE MADE EVERY FLIGHT and the kids didn't have one problem! They eat just about anything and Berto eats more than most adults (so we really need to figure out why he only weighs 31lbs) He is just tiny.....but smart and cute as can be! So is Marie.....they are both just darling!
So far our biggest trial is trying to convince both of them that Louie and Maggie are NOT GOING TO EAT THEM! They literally climb the closest object (or person) the minute they see either dog.......and they completely freak out like they just saw the meanest, badest monster on planet earth! I'm not quite sure what we are going to do about that..........however, it does solve the problem I envisioned before we went, of two little kids running crazy in the house and "breaking into" the pantry every 10 minutes......because as long as the dogs are free, they prefer playing with toys in their room! So........we will have to work on the dog thing. EVEN having the dogs leashed to the dining room table doesn't seem to calm them .....they just keep their eye on the dogs to make sure there is "good distance" between them! AND the pool was the same.....poor Berto just royally freaked out because Louie was circling the pool while we were trying to swim this evening......Oh....I do hope this is our biggest challenge! :)

We feel very blessed! They are amazing little children and we are all very happy (and relieved) they are finally home!!! Our thanks to all of you for your prayers....as our prayers will continue for all of our friends still waiting to bring their children home!

WE ARE GOING TO HAITI!!!

2008-07-15T00:22:00.000-07:00

We just found out our children have visas!!! Our trip to Haiti will be short but sweet this time. We arrive on Sunday and leave on Tuesday. Just enough time to visit with our friends at Foyer de Sion http://www.foyerdesion.org/ and our friends at the Holt Fontana village http://www.holtintl.org/

The best part - we don't have to leave Marie Vierge and Roberto this time!!! They are coming HOME!!!

It is late, I am very tired and I have a ton to do before we leave but check back I'm sure to post some wonderful photos next week!

Bonne Nuit!

VISA Appointment!!!

2008-07-10T13:51:00.000-07:00

I just found out we have a visa appointment for tomorrow! Our orphanage director will have to do it for us because we can not get to Haiti in one day!

Praying all goes well and my kids will have visas tomorrow! This will set us free to go get them and bring them home!!!

I'm speechless!

One more day...

2008-07-07T13:44:00.000-07:00

...to wait for an appointment. Apparently the medical documents were not turned in with our other documents last week. The orphanage director will be turning them in tomorrow and hopefully getting an appointment for us.

Here is a fun picture just because they are so cute!

If you will, please join us...

2008-07-05T23:05:00.000-07:00

...in fasting and prayer. If you read this and believe in the power of fasting and prayer, we will be praying for a visa appointment for July 15 or 17th. We hope to get an answer from the Embassy on Monday. This will give us a chance at reasonable airfare and allow us to focus on preparing to bring home Marie and Roberto.

I will also need to get Marisa and Katiana ready for girls camp and Michael ready for Scout camp......so, having an answer on Monday would really help me focus.

Today we moved all of Zac's stuff into Michael's room......so they will now share rooms. We bought two twin mattresses on Thursday for Marie and Roberto so we are now ready for them to come home. I have a few clothes for the kids but find it difficult to buy from my imagination. I get confused trying to figure out what will fit them........When we first met them, the clothes I brought were way too big. Little Roberto would put TWO pairs of shorts on and then we would fold down the waist band to keep them from falling off........I'm not sure why he wanted to wear two pair but it worked. He was 5 years old and the clothes were 3T's. Marie had the same problem, she was 6 and we brought size 4T for her. I have to laugh, as I remember turning around to see her run right out of her skort! We promptly found a safety pin to fix that problem! They are so adorable! They are now 7 and 8 years old. I am so ready for them to be home. I'm ready to love them and help them overcome whatever challenges they may have. I'm just READY! For one who procrastinates..........I would say I'm way OVERDUE on being ready and I hope and pray we get a visa appointment that allows us to travel very soon.

Last Monday I finally reached the point of accepting they would be home on time. I lost all desire to argue and complain about the exhausting process this has been. I actually bought a plane ticket to attend our company tradeshow in Chicago (July 17 - 19 --and more than anything I hope my plan gets messed up). I just reached this place of TRUST - trusting God had ALL the power to bring them home and HE would bring them home on time. This realization came with a sense of peace......although, there is a portion of peace that can not come until they are with us, a part of my heart remains heavy as it has been.......its just a feeling of trust that came which allowed me some added peace. The next day I received an e-mail from the Embassy. I had to open it three times before I knew for sure it was from the Embassy and not USCIS (even though it was signed "Yours truly, Adoptions Unit, US Embassy). The e-mail said they had received our approved adoption petition and then listed the final documents needed to complete our adoptions. The last request in the e-mail was "when would we be available for an appointment". My prayers were being answered right before my eyes.

The next day, our facilitator called me to tell me she thought we had a visa appointment on Thursday morning. Of course, we couldn't get to Haiti that quickly so we hoped and prayed that the orphanage director could set a new appointment for July 8th. Things didn't work out on Thursday for the orphanage director to meet with the Adoptions Unit, although she tried, so we are now hoping Monday we will be able to confirm our appointment and arrange our travel.

Wish I had some current photos of the kids......maybe I'll just find some favorites and add them for fun. THANKS to all who joins us in prayer and fasting (or just prayer :) or just positive thinking :) We appreciate all of you!

I've been tagged (into blogging again)!

2008-06-22T13:27:00.000-07:00

Thanks Tana........I'm writing on my blog today because of your tag ;)

5 Things I was doing 10 years ago...

I just had my fourth baby boy - and my first brown eyed child!

I was a stay at home mom pinching pennies in half.

I was dreaming about my own business.

I was probably not getting enough sleep and changing alot of diapers

I was.... can't remember, that was a long time ago!

5 Things on my to do list...

Re-arrange the kids bedrooms

Buy Katiana a *PINK* bicycle helmet

Prepare for QuicKutz board meeting

Mail my mom and dads combined mothers day/fathers day presents (YES I'm very late!)

Finish reading "Three Cups of Tea"

5 favorite snacks/food

Dannon Peach/Passionfruit yogurt drink

Bananas

Pumpkin pie

Burritos

Chocolate Potatoe Cake

5 Things I would do if I was a billionaire...

Finish the Foyer de Sion orphanage in Haiti (how original, right Tana?)

Start a business which employs people from Haiti

Take my entire family (including parents, siblings and anyone else who claims me as family) on a Foyer de Sion service trip THEN on a fabulous cruise!

Travel the World

Buy a ranch with lots of trees and a stream going through it.....of course, horses too, maybe even a few chickens and one of those little goats that faint when startled ;)

5 Bad habits...

The opposite of "early to bed and early to rise"

procrastination (look at my to do list)

hiding clutter

avoiding the mailbox

biting my toenails.......just kidding but I couldn't think of anything else that I was willing to admit.

5 Places I have lived...

Salt Lake City, Costa Mesa, Tustin, Provo, Cedar Hills......good thing they didn't ask for 6!

5 People I'm tagging...

Jeni
Casey
Amy
Wendy.....but don't do it if your computer is packed up for your move ;)
Becky

I am back!

2008-05-23T09:49:00.000-07:00

Well......after a very long break from blogging - I'm BACK! Life has been crazy for too many reasons around the Hixon home. Having Katiana home is NOT one of those reasons! She is simply an amazing young girl who seems to have found her place! Honestly I prepared for things to be more difficult, with all the books and experiences I was learning from. This preparation really opened my mind to the variety of possibilities and potential challenges of older child adoption. While I am grateful for the time I had to prepare I still feel some sadness over the long process that steals time away from families and children waiting. I am also filled with deep gratitude for the blessings we are receiving as our family is changing!

This week we received the MOST WONDERFUL NEWS about our little Marie and Roberto! THEY HAVE PASSPORTS!!! This really is the last step required from the Haitian government! This is such a huge step - Freedom from the process that has been part of our lives for the past 24 months!!! Really, Marie and Roberto have been part of my daily thoughts for the past 31 months....I can't believe they were only 4 and 5 years old when we started this process......now they are 7 and 8!

I requested the services of a wonderful Doctor in Haiti a couple of weeks ago. She sent me this picture of Marie and Roberto with a report from a check-up she did. She mentioned in her report that we may want to do a bone x-ray to check their ages.....as she did the same thing I did two years ago, and that is - QUESTION their ages based on their sizes. The good news is Roberto weighed in a 31.5 lbs when the last report I had said he was 29lbs. At 7 years old (if he is that) that is pretty little....... Marie is 40lbs and is 13months older than Roberto. She reported that Marie was very talkative but Roberto didn't speak a single word. Well.....this could be why Roberto doesn't gain much weight.......he is not the squeaky wheel demanding attention! The picture brings so many emotions to the surface for me. First, it resembles early pictures we received of the two of them - sad, no smiles, frail, hurting, scared.....I see all of these things in their faces. I love that Marie has her arm around Roberto.....that too has been a consistent theme in pictures we have received over the past two years. I'm sad that they don't seem happy - but I'm sure it is because they are at a DOCTOR's office and they are not thrilled about that! HOWEVER, I have really been worried about them since our last visit in September. We were only able to spend one day and night with them and I have been concerned about what ideas they must have about us. I wonder, if they wonder, what having a family *really* means? Can you even imagine having your family come visit 3 times in two years. AND this family looks and sounds different! And from their perspective.....they must really think we are kind of stupid given they talk to us and we smile with dumb eyes trying to figure out what they are saying.....they must really think they got stuck with a bunch of crazies.....as I can't imagine they are old enough to even understand the concept of a different language! It is what it is and I can't change it......but I wish some sanity would be enforced to the process of international adoption! I can't tell you how many times I have wondered where the justice is in this process! A process that should be celebrated is questioned over and over and over by every person along the way holding power. Ugh......I didn't mean to turn this into a negative post.......I'm really, really, trying to be positive as we enter the last step of getting our children's visas. Things haven't been going so good for many of my friends in this last step. I pray for them. I am also praying we get visas in a reasonable amount of time. My definition of that is 2 - 3 weeks -- unfortunately, many of my friends have been waiting 10, 12, 14 weeks! I really need your prayers......I just can't stand much more of this wondering what they are wondering!

Please join us in sincere prayers for all the families waiting to get their children home from Haiti. Please pray for the children, the caregivers, the families and the people with the power to do the right thing!

Turning 14!

2008-02-24T22:03:00.000-08:00

...In January

Katiana had her "14th" birthday!

She got her own IPOD! Had a "Cookies & Cream" ice cream cake and had lots of fun bowling with her friends and family! AND look! She has found friends just like her!

Looking back...

2008-02-24T21:04:00.000-08:00

...in November...

We went to California for Thanksgiving. Went to the beach - rented dorky tourist bicycles, saw a sea lion at the end of the pier, ate lots of turkey, rolls and PIE, went to see WICKED at the Pantages Theatre, L.A. Car show, shopping!, saw the movie Enchanted and just had lots of fun at Grandma and Grandpa's house! AND.....we took a family picture but someone didn't feel like smiling UNTIL...

our photographer (thanks AMY) cracked a funny!

In December....we had a WHITE Christmas!

Katiana got her own PINK bicycle!

We ALL went sledding...

even the dog!

I'm back!

2008-02-24T20:44:00.000-08:00

...for a bit that is. I will probably get back into a routine blogging just in time for my two little ones to come home......and it could get quiet around here again. The above picture is my latest of Marie and Roberto. Their files are still in MOI waiting to be approved for Haitian passports. My best guess is we will travel sometime in May. At least I hope for this.

Adoption update...

2007-11-15T20:45:00.000-08:00

We rec'd this update from our agency.

Dear Natasha and Mark,
I had so much fun visiting with your two darling, silly, slightly rambunctious two munchkins at Fontamara!
One day, for a whole hour I sat wincing upstairs at Fontamara while Marie Vierge created a master piece with my hair…..I would send you pictures of the end result, but then you would have blackmail on me for the rest of your life! Natasha, I really think you should let her do your hair before church some Sunday! Roberto was his shy, “don’t pay attention to me….but O.K. I really do want you to pay attention to me self”. He loved the Velcro mitt and tennis balls I brought and never could get enough of with playing with them.
They are both doing so well and are happy and well adjusted!

Marie-Vierge’s measurements are:
Height: 44 ½ “
Weight: 37.6 lbs.

Roberto’s Measurements are:
Height: 39”
Weight: 29.3 lbs.

As extra fun and in celebration of the holiday I brought a huge box of dress up clothes for the kids to play with. Boy did they have a blast…Well I’ll reword that, Marie-Vierge thought it was great…Roberto gave me the “What the heck do you want me to wear that for you Crazy Lady” look.
I truly had a wonderful time with your amazing children!
I gave them plenty of hugs and kisses from their Mamma!

Thanks to our friends at Foyer we have these fun pictures!!! The letter perfectly describes our little ones!

I also received an e-mail explaining they are trying something new in hopes of speeding things up in the end. They gave USCIS certified copies of our dossiers so they can begin the orphan investigation which requires an interview with the birthparents. This usually isn't done until the children have their passports. Because USCIS is allowing the investigation to be done with the certified copies we can get that part done at the same time our original dossiers are waiting in the MOI office. MOI approves the dossiers for Haitian passports. Once they are approved they send them to the immigration office who actually prints the passports. The average wait in MOI is 4 months. We are not yet in MOI but hope to be in the next week or two. So, with a little luck... they could be home in April. Of course, we will continue to pray for them to come home soon and would gladly accept a little miracle of an earlier arrival.

when it rains it pours...

2007-11-08T12:33:00.000-08:00

...and I'm catching up on my blog!

Here is a photo. This photo inspired my last post "wonder". Along with the photo, my efforts to do what is right as a mother - which isn't always what is nice- also inspired that post.

The photo is of Marie with a dear friend. My friend was blessed to travel to Haiti in October for a Foyer de Sion parent trip. She met her two little girls for the first time. On Sunday, they attended church and my little Marie was there. She picked her up and gave her a kiss and told her "that was from your mamma". I'm very grateful for this picture....because this is the little girl I remember... and she is happy! This helps me to endure the long wait. Unfortunately, Roberto wasn't at church.....but I can guess his picture would be "less happy" because he doesn't like his photo taken and he probably wouldn't be too thrilled with a strange woman picking him up and kissing him!

The other thoughts that inspired the "wonder" post came from mothering Katiana. She is a beautiful and amazing young girl! She is so happy! She sings in the shower! WELL, I THINK THAT is a sign of happiness! She skips, she laughs, she teases, she is just so well adjusted AND...she sometimes pulls a crybaby act that mimicks my 5 year old neice. WELL.....perhaps this behavior worked for her in the past, or she is TESTING me. 2 1/2 times now, she has tried this approach. The 1/2 time I was able to nip it before it made it to tears. The other two times she used this behavior, I had to make a quick descision and it didn't include what seemed the *nice* thing to do. She poured on the tears. I told her she had no reason to cry. Last week I called her bluff when I suggested we talk with our neighbor (who speaks Creole) so I could better understand why she was "sad" and crying. I explained it was ok to be sad and it was ok to cry but she needed to help me understand why....and our neighbor could help. I think when she realized she was pulling the "crybaby, pouty, sulking, you are the meanest person in the world act" because I told her she couldn't do something, she realized she really didn't have a good reason to act this way and she didn't want to have to explain that to our neighbor. Of course, both times she has done this, it was from me telling her she couldn't do something. Both times *I knew* she wasn't really sad. I have seen her sad - and we turn things around very differently when she truly is feeling sad. SO..... I wonder - am I doing this right? I hope so.

wonder

2007-11-08T11:38:00.000-08:00

I wonder about a lot of things. As a mother, I sometimes wonder if I'm doing things right. Thankfully, I have seven amazing children and they help me to be a better mother. Two of our children are still in Haiti. Collectively, I have only had a little over two weeks of actual mothering influence with them. Everyday, I think of them. I think of them in Haiti and with those thoughts come joy. Indescribable joy. And with those thoughts come a burden. A mothers love bottled up for two years - anxiety about their well being, sad they aren't with us --where we can tickle them everyday, and hug and love them, read to them, teach them new things, give them a place of belonging ....a family!-- frustrated the process of adoption has to be so complicated. So with each thought of joy comes a feeling of sadness because the are still in Haiti.

Maybe today I'm writing this because it was two years ago I found Marie and Roberto and I wondered. I wondered if *I* could be *their* mother. I wondered about a lot of things two years ago....things I no longer wonder about. They are Hixon's now. But I still must wait for the process of adoption to be completed before they can join us. I still wonder about plenty of things.....like how many more chairs and couches our dog Louie will chew up when they come home (Louie - our Jack Russell is currently struggling the most with having Katiana home), how they will fit into our family, what struggles having two more children will bring....of course, I like to wonder about the joys they will bring too. I wonder about the unknown. What I do not wonder about anymore is *if* we are doing the right thing. Of course we are. We are a lucky family.

catching up...

2007-11-08T11:17:00.000-08:00

...computer time has been a bit scarce over the past weeks since Katiana came home! She has been home 7 weeks now! We have had fantastic fall weather - very mild and beautiful!

I'm a bit late.....but here is a Halloween picture...

I think Katiana was a bit uncertain about the whole thing....so the morning of Halloween, she told me "me no Halloween" so off to school she went dressed like a 7th grader. After school, Marisa told me Katiana seemed a bit upset on the bus and ran away from the group and home. Earlier in the day, I purchased a witch hat with purple hair attached, thinking she could at least wear the fun hat and still enjoy going door-to-door with the kids.......but Marisa told me she liked all the princess costumes she saw during the day at school. So......the witch hat became mine and Katiana and I took off for the party supply store at 4:00 p.m. on Halloween day to find her a princess costume! WE SCORED this "medieval princess" costume in the clearance section for $10! Add some beads, a black wig, a tiara and HER SISTER to do make-up and hair.....and she became a princess for the night! When the first group of children came to our door trick or treating.....I yelled for her to come answer it.......she was delighted to see them and hand out candy!

week-end in Portland - part III

2007-11-07T13:54:00.000-08:00

Life has kept us busy! Too busy to keep up with our blog! SO...finally, I am posting part III to our week-end in Portland! The REASON for the trip was to attend the Holt International Auction. The goal -- raising money for the children in Haiti! The girl on the poster is one of Katiana's good friends -- who, by the way, is still waiting for a family. She is beautiful and we hope she is matched with a family very soon!

This picture is of Katiana, Gary Gamer, Holt's President and CEO and Peter Fontana who is the founder of the Holt Fontana Village.

Peter Fontana was asked to speak a bit about the realities in Haiti and about the needs of the Holt Fontana Village. During his speech, he asked Katiana to join him. Just after he spoke, the auctioneer asked for cash donations to help build another house at the village. He began with a request for a $5,000 pledge. Two people raised their cards! He then went to $2,500 and I think about 8 people raised their cards.....he continued with $1,000 and $500 and $100. I think from this 15 minutes they raised $35,000!!! We are convinced Katiana and her cute smile brought that money in! :)

Overall - The benefit brought in $159,000 dollars that will be used for the Haiti program! PLUS the $25,000 QuicKutz raised with the cookbook project! We were touched by the generosity of those who attended! I hope to visit the Kaliko and the Holt Fontana Village again someday......maybe then, they will have twice as many children to love... and a PLAYGROUND too!

After the auction ended Katiana meet Miss Oregon who was attending the benefit! Aren't they beautiful!

week-end in Portland part - II

2007-10-29T12:18:00.000-07:00

After a lovely breakfast at the Comfort Inn in Seaside we drove back to Cannon Beach. The reason we returned to Cannon Beach was to watch the artists at Icefire Studio. I found this studio last March on a business trip. At that time I purchased a small blue and green vase to add to my china hutch as a reminder of my Portland trip.

Before we left, I was agonizing over which piece to buy to add to my collection -- and the sales women working there realized my pain. Instead of helping, she told me she had another piece that Jim Kingwell had just finished that she thought I might like. She retrieved it from the back room and sure enough.......I loved it! Of course, I immediately told her I thought it might break the bank! Because I had been admiring one similar to it in blues and greens and it was $500! She said, "let me check with Jim, he is very reasonable". Ok, up to this point I had my eye on a bowl that was $140 and I thought for sure she would come back and tell me the price would be somewhere between $400 and $500 dollars! Instead she said $250! So......here is a picture of it! It looks great in the hutch......and I love the combination of orange and pink glass twisting together!

Watching them work was fascinating!

Of course, we couldn't leave the coast without one more walk on the beach. Katiana wasn't interested because it was windy and cold again. Look at how angry the sea was! It had been very stormy with high winds the day before we arrived. I love the sea!

A week-end in Portland - part I

2007-10-25T10:59:00.000-07:00

We went to Portland! Mark, Katiana and me. Our purpose? The Holt Fontana Auction to raise money for the village in Haiti. I don't have the exact number yet but our educated guess is Holt raised approximately $150,000.00 Wahoo! I will write more about that in part III.

We arrived around 10:00 a.m. on Friday. Our plan was to drive out to the coast and stay a night allowing us to explore the Oregon coast on Friday and Saturday before the big event Saturday evening.

We rented our car, got some McDonald's, drove in and out of lots of rain while working our way out highway 6 - which dumped us right at the Tillamook Cheese Plant! We took a self guided tour of the cheese plant....which includes samples! Yummy. Of course they do more than cheese :) So, loaded with our driving snacks (beef sticks, cheese curds and water crackers) we decided to also *sample* the ICE CREAM before we hit the road.

The picture below is along highway 101 between Tillamook and Cannon Beach! It was cold, very windy and absolutely beautiful!

We made it to Cannon Beach driving in and out of LOTS of rain! Fortunately our beach time was free from rain! BUT....it was COLD and WINDY!!! We were trying to get a good picture of us with the rocks in the background........and, well - we just got this one instead - HAIR everywhere!

So we bagged the rocks and let the wind blow in our face instead!

This is one of my "do it myself pictures"! Not bad huh? You can't even tell I'm holding my arm out and taking a picture!

OK.....I just love this picture! Katiana has that smile and laugh that speaks volumes! I think the cold, the wind and the fact that we were "willingly" out exploring in it amused her!

Love the light in this fabulous picture! Mark kept teasing Katiana about her hair standing up! too cute!

Katiana has a way of making friends. She just walks up and smiles and instantly perfect strangers are asking if she would like to feed the birds too.

Ok......that was a bit CLOSE! All the while, I'm praying she doesn't get a yucky white "you know what" on her new coat -- or worse in her HAIR!

So much JOY!!!

This was a miracle.....for sure I thought the camera was going to be blown off the rock and in the sand!

Haystack rock at Cannon Beach, OR

a trip to the zoo...

2007-10-23T13:13:00.000-07:00

...the kids had a short fall break from school so we took advantage of the warm weather and went to Hogle Zoo! We had a great time! It was so much fun to see Katiana's reaction to all of the animals! Here are some of our favorite pictures....

elephants and giraffes...and Zac's beloved penguins....Katiana and Marisa's favorite was the baby Orangutan...
I cheated and pulled this cute photo from Wikipedia because we couldn't get a good shot of the cute baby orangutan that entertained us at Hogle Zoo.

very cute sisters....
All the kids....(minus Steven but adding cousin Amber) posing pretty with the giant ape!

uh..ooh...starting to act like...
...an ape
They were convincing me that maybe they should LIVE here too!

We ended the day with a train ride, some silly souveniers and Marisa losing her cell phone in the duck pond! Yes, it was retrieved.....and unbelievably it still works!

Gratitude...

2007-10-16T13:39:00.000-07:00

...has been on my mind and heart daily over the past several weeks. First, gratitude to my Heavenly Father for my many blessings! I can not list my blessings because there are simply too many (and my kids will be home from school in 30 minutes!).

I am overwhelmed with gratitude as I ponder my many blessings. My family ranks very high on my list of blessings. My heart is full and tears come to my eyes as I watch how well each member of my family is adjusting to having Katiana home. I have seen the Lord's hand almost daily as we make adjustments. Every member of the Hixon family has stepped up and caught the spirit of our *new* family! For this I am unable to properly express my gratitude - it fills my heart with joy.

Gratitude for my family and friends who have reached out to us. Visits, phone calls, help, gifts - gifts from family and friends Katiana has never met --- when I explain a package that has arrived in the mail for her from a *friend* she hasn't yet met.......she lights up! I KNOW she understands she has family and friends that love her and are expressing their love with gifts.

Gratitude for neighbors. Neighbors who have welcomed her with such warmth. Neighbor kids who greet her at school and look after her (and track down the mean boys who squirted her with water in ceramics class....come to find out, it was an accident....but that didn't stop one of the neighbor boys from hauling the two culprits over to Marisa who was ready to give them both a good fonging!) And for another neighbor who helped us *forget* the hard day at school by having us over and teaching us how to make jewelry - LOTS of jewelry for all of us! What a fun way to turn lemons into lemonade!

Gratitude for people in our community. Dr. Clayton who convinced Katiana that Doctors are "tres gentile", Our friends who work at the Jr. High school who helped get her in all the right classes, a new friends mom who offered to come to school and translate during Ceramics class - all because her daughter has taken an interest in Katiana and knew her Mom speaks French.

Gratitude for Mansour Masse and Holt International for providing a safe and loving home for Katiana and for the good work they do around the world for those who are so deserving of help....and of course, for helping us navigate our way through a very difficult adoption process. Gratitude for all the housemoms who loved and taught Katiana over the past 10 years. Gratitude for Betty and Phil Snyder and Mission Possible and GLOW Ministries that also influenced Katiana's sweet attitude and for the work they do for so many others in Haiti. Gratitude for her birth parents who loved her and found a safe place for her to receive that which they struggled to give her.

Gratitude for ALL who picked up their phones and called on our behalf when we were denied her visa. Gratitude to those who were able to push things even more after we encountered the bad man in Haiti! I know good people I never met helped encourage the visa office in Washington D.C. on our behalf (of course, THANK YOU to a certain brother and an executive at Holt for their influence on this gov't office!)

Gratitude for our good friends in Haiti - at Holt Fontana and Foyer de Sion for their kindness and support. For their commitment to the children of Haiti. For their determination in bringing about positive change for Haiti. YOU inspire me to be better and instill in me a desire to do more. And....I am greatly blessed because I now have another beautiful daughter and she has this amazing Haitian spirit! AND I will soon be blessed with two more beautiful children who are equally bright in spirit. When I ponder the blessing of children......it makes the struggle of bringing them home pale in comparison. I am very blessed. For this I thank my Father in Heaven every day.

The moment I post this it will be outdated because my gratitude grows. Thank you all - my heart is full as I continue to witness the many blessings that are working together to bless our family.

Two week update...

2007-10-07T21:55:00.000-07:00

...I can't believe it has only been two weeks since we have been home from Haiti!!! Katiana had a house full of family and friends to greet her. These two pictures were taken at the neighborhood park the day we arrived home!

The day after we got home (Saturday) we went to the mall to find her some shoes to wear with her pretty pink dress......the one I bought for her LAST December! Thank goodness it fits - because she looks so pretty in pink! I think the mall was a bit overwhelming! At least it was for me.

We spent a week together - just the two of us! We visited the Doctor, shopped, tried new food, registered for school and learned to ride a bicycle! Katiana is full of adventure! Well, with most everything....except FOOD! She is being a bit stubborn about trying new things! I think she has issues with texture.....because the mashed potatoes and marshmallows were a definite NO! Of course, every time we catch her eating french fries, potato chips, hashbrowns, etc., we make sure to tell her she is eating POTATOES! Ha, ha, ha.....she is a good sport about it. The night we went to dinner at the Brick Oven restaurant - she ordered the buffet. She was able to eat all she wanted from the salad bar and soup and pasta bar. We all started off with salads and when we got back to the table - Mark said "don't look now but someone dished up potato salad! She ate it too!

One night we had a really yummy chicken dish - one our family all loves! It has sour cream, cream cheese, cream of chicken soup and italian dressing mix. We eat it over rice most of the time and it is just yummy! I worried Katiana might find it too rich so I dished her up some rice without covering it with the sauce and set the chicken on the side. She refused to try it. We all went to work trying to convince her it was "gooood" but she wasn't buying it! So finally, after telling her to "try" it in Creole over and over.....I said (with a smile) "no try, no bicycle". She is so expressive and just couldn't stand the thought of no bicycle so in went the chicken and in went a bite of rice.....and before I knew it she was handing her plate to me for seconds! After dinner, she made sure the little bit of sauce from the crockpot was eaten before she brought me the dish to wash!

She loves pizza, hamburgers and soda pop. One morning she tried to have soda pop and potato chips for breakfast! Good thing I was there.....because I quickly let her know that wasn't a good breakfast!!! She got orange juice and waffles instead! She is mostly stubborn in the morning. I have made french toast and pancakes -- both of which she ate at the Kaliko with me in Haiti. She refuses to eat them - so that leaves her to choose between frozen waffles or cereal. Last Thursday when she refused the pancakes for a second time (and I even offered them with strawberries and sugar!) she ended up with some frozen waffles......and as she was eating them - I looked at her with a little smile and said "pancakes are better than waffles" she smiled back and I'm certain she knows exactly what I was communicating. Funny girl - testing me with food! What she doesn't know for sure yet is......Mom is MORE stubborn :)

We are discovering that she understands quite a few things in English. In fact, she probably has been laughing at us all along because we overly try to help her understand our English. I know it is really lame.....but when you don't know what else to do - you begin saying your words slow with stupid facial expressions like somehow that will make her understand better! I'm pretty sure she has been amused by all of it! She is pretty smart and a tease too! So......she fits in perfectly around here!

She surprised me the other day when the kids made some good old Kraft mac and cheese. I asked her if she wanted some and without hesitation -she dished it up and ate it up- as if she had eaten mac and cheese a hundred times before! So whats the deal? - is mac and cheese the universal kid food? I didn't get the impression they had it at the Holt Fontana Village.....but perhaps they do!

So.....it seems all I have been talking about is food.....but it seems to be pretty important to her! She has mentioned on more than one occasion that she doesn't want to get fat. So.....another good reason she can't have soda and chips for breakfast! :) I'm not quite sure of the foundation of her worries - but I'm sure as we begin to communicate better we will better understand a lot of things!

Speaking of communication! Her second week home - she started school! I had planned to play things by "ear" and realized we would probably drive each other crazy if she didn't get going to school soon. She is so eager to learn and I am so proud of her! We went together to the Jr. High on her first three days of school. I must say - she is very brave to "jump in" like she has. I came home thankful I didn't have to face the hallways of the Jr. High everyday! Wow! At least I was overwhelmed ....and the LUNCHROOM - now that IS scary! Anyway, she attended her first week and after she spent an afternoon and evening trying to learn decimals and place values.....we decided she needed to hold off on math and focus on English. So she has more *fun* classes like, choir, ceramics, p.e., english, and a FOODS class. I love that she is in a FOODS class - now her teacher and peers can try and get her to eat new things!

Today (Sunday) we went for a drive in the mountains to see the changing leaves and the SNOW! Yesterday as the snow was beginning to coat the mountain she said the mountain looked like "cookies and cream". Well, I guess having cookies and cream ice cream three times in two weeks has something to do with it! Before the drive, Mark helped her make a batch of brownies because yesterday I caught her in the pantry "eyeing" the brownie mix!

I will close with this beautiful picture taken in Haiti. Life in Utah is beautiful too....and I loved when Katiana said to me just a couple of days ago, while driving in the car "mom, Utah is pretty". Yes, it is and so is Haiti! "Pretty" can be found anywhere if you just know how to look for it! Katiana is such a delightful young girl! She has an amazing attitude and is full of life. We all feel very blessed she is finally home! She was so cute about one week home, she was sitting on the stairs alone and I asked her if she was sad. She nodded yes and I asked "why?" She threw her head back with a smile and said "I don't know". I'm sure she was missing her friends in Haiti - so we talked about that and I tried to help her understand it was "ok" to be sad and happy too. She really does have a sweet spirit about her! We feel very blessed and all are well here at the Hixon home!

part VI - favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.005-07:00

...of all of us in Haiti!!!

part V - favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.004-07:00

...of Steven while in Haiti!

Steven is so good with little kids! Marie and Roberto had so much fun with him!

Steven meeting Katiana!

Steven *enjoying the sounds of music* as the children at the Holt Fontana village performed for him!

Steven also *enjoyed* his new "do"!

...as well as the "squishy" car rides!

part IV - favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.003-07:00

of Marisa while in Haiti... She loves this little guy!

Marisa had a cool hair style going at the Kaliko!

Exhausted at the El Rancho Hotel... too tired to actually get in the pool and swim!

part III - favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.002-07:00

...of Katiana while in Haiti!

Can't wait to post an update about how she is doing at HOME!!! She is full of spunk and sparkle! Hopefully I will find a minute to post about all she has been up to soon!

part II - favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.001-07:00

...of Roberto while in Haiti!

I sure miss his smiley little face!

Some favorite pictures...

2007-10-01T21:16:00.000-07:00

...of Marie while in Haiti.

I love this picture of Marisa fixing Marie's hair! I love that cute little smile AND, Marisa is sure getting good at this hair thing!

Great job Marisa! Marie looks darling!

We are HOME!!!

2007-09-24T18:58:00.000-07:00

...and we couldn't be more happy!

We left Haiti on Thursday, Sept. 20 and stayed the night in Miami. On Friday we flew to Dallas then to S.L.C. arriving to the airport around noon. This picture is of Katiana arriving in S.L.C. sitting in the pilots seat with his hat on. She is an adventursome young lady. Her face changed from wonder to smiles all the way home as she experienced her first plane ride, escalator, moving sidewalk, chicken nuggets, cookies and cream ice cream cone, hot water shower, airport train (without a driver! - that one evoked lots of question marks in her eyes!) m&m's and freeways with lots of cars driving fast!

She was greeted by friends and family all week-end long! Including a quick visit from Grandma and Grandpa Parkin who stayed a couple of nights. Saturday we braved the mall so she would have some shoes to wear to church with her pretty pink dress.....of course, it turned cold here in Utah so she needed a sweater too! And a trip to the mall isn't complete without some pretty new jewelry to finish off the outfit!

Sunday she looked so pretty in her new outfit and she made it through church without wearing out her smile! After church, the kids came in and ransacked the kitchen.....so lunch was kind of a free for all! She talked Mark into making spaghetti....but couldn't find the "jambon" in the fridge to add in. I don't think she was too impressed with our traditional style italian spaghetti.

Sometime around two o'clock she discovered the bicycles and scooters in the garage.... so Mark spent the next two hours running along side her teaching her how to ride a bike! First time ever on a bike! She is so excited to learn and try new things! AND.....no rest for the weary (Mark and I). Mark was so cute and patient with her! All the kids have welcomed her and have had so much fun teaching her all "their tricks".

She spent some time on Friday with all her "new friends". AND again, on Saturday she hung out with her teenage sister for "night games" at a friends house! She is up for just about anything -- although, I had to talk her into trying dinner last night.....which she ended up liking!

Today (Monday) she said good-bye to her grandparents with kisses for both as they left to go home to California, she visited the Doctor....who I promised was "tres gentile" and after the visit she agreed - he was "very nice". AND...she had her first Mexican food! She wasn't too excited about bean and cheese burritos.....but liked the cheese enchilada and beef taco....and of course, the rice and coca cola!

Our trip to Haiti had a little more drama than we bargained for! First - the earliest visa appointment we could get was Friday morning 4 hours before our flights......because of a problem our friend *Gassant* created......we didn't get her visa! Yeah, the "irrevocably and unconditionally" wording problem was now OUR problem....even though CLEARLY her father desired to relinquish his rights and didn't care too much about HOW it was worded! From what I hear.....this problem has a resolution now. Our timing has been impecable with every step of our adoption! At the last minute....Mark and I decided I should stay with Katiana until she could get her visa! I was so ready to go home ....so I had to really change my mind set and accept that I was staying, knowing nothing would happen until at least Monday.

We enjoyed our week-end UNTIL...... SUNDAY night-- when the most evil man I have ever met decided to show-off his power and make our kids cry! Of course, he got us all a bit worked up as he threatened to have us arrested and take our kids away from us because we didn't have papers "proving our relationship" with them. He went a bit too far when he spoke of the problems of child trafiking -- in an effort to justify his horrible conduct! What a CREEP! ...is all I have to say about him for the time being! Oh.....and for the record his name is *Gassant*. AND he is NO friend to the children of Haiti even though he hides behind the platform of trafiking children! WHAT A CREEP!

Sunday night was without sleep for me because I thought this guy was sick enough to really take Katiana away from me.......Monday came and he was gone and I went to the Embassy - partly because this guy scared me (mostly because he is crazy!) and to inform them of what happened! Apparently, the eejit has a reputation because they knew him and, although shocked - not too surprised. Tuesday came and went without a visa.....Wednesday a.m. I got the best phone call from Mr. Duffy saying I had a visa!!! Yeah! I was so grateful because I really did NOT want to spend another week-end in Haiti after the last one!

Thursday a.m. I signed papers at the USCIS office in Haiti so *HOPEFULLY* I can avoid all of this when it is time to bring MV and R home!

Thanks to ALL OF YOU who prayed for us.......and called... and called... and called... the Visa office and the Children's Issues office in Washington D.C. on our behalf! Really, I can't thank you enough......I know the phone calls made a difference! AND the prayers made the biggest difference as Sunday night we (Katiana and I and the other Holt family with their two little ones) were protected from the evil of one man who thinks he can treat people anyway he wants! What a creep!!! .....did I mention that already?

As for today, all is well, we are home and Katiana is anxious to learn! She has a bright spirit and she is full of spunk! We are so blessed to have her home... FINALLY!

THEY ARE COMING HOME!

2007-09-20T13:50:00.000-07:00

It won't be long now...I just spoke with Natasha...her and Katiana are in the airport and they are about to begin boarding the plane for Miami !!! Finally !!! I also spoke with Katiana and she is sooooo excited. I can't imagine what she must be thinking. I felt I should post on behalf of Natasha and let you all know as many of you have been so concerned for us and want to know what is going on. The waiting was killing me too !!! So, thank you all for the words of encouragement and for your prayers. I'm sure that Natasha will have another great post for you all tomorrow evening...this time from HOME!!! Thanks again for everything! Mark

We HAVE A VISA!!!

2007-09-19T10:18:00.000-07:00

Finally! We have Katiana's visa!!! I just found out the news and Mark is working on getting us plane tickets! We hope to be home late Thursday night or sometime Friday! I can't describe how happy I am right now - we are both so ready to be home!

Thank you to everyone who helped us by making phone calls and praying for us! We love all of you very much!

Au Revoir!
Natasha and Katiana!!!

The Big Bad Wolf...

2007-09-17T17:47:00.000-07:00

Sunday night was a nightmare! We encountered the big bad wolf at dinner. We, K, me, and the other Holt family adopting two little ones were threatend by a "man" who wouldn't identify himself, to take our children from us and have us arrested for not having papers to prove our relationship with "these" children.

I will post the scary yet ridiculous story AFTER I come home!

UNBELIEVABLE!

Oh....and the man showed us his ID and he is a Haitian Gov't official! Never in my wildest dreams did I think I had to worry about the gov't officials threatening me.....I thought the travel warning was for all the thugs involved with kidnappings!.....hmmmmmm

Something positive to post...

2007-09-16T11:00:00.000-07:00

While reading my back log of e-mails....I came across a wonderful e-mail from Foyer de Sion telling us our files for Marie-Vierge and Roberto made it OUT of the Civil Court in Haiti!!!

This means we are now recognized as their parents by the Haitian Government.

Your guess is as good as mine when they will come home....but, at least we are making progress!

Melting in Haiti...

p.s. while typing this blog I had two cute girls ...Katiana and her friend "R" fixing my hair! AND.....if you are reading...Deb L and Tom....."R" is a "knock-out" so you better dig out the shotgun so you can be polishing it when the boys come around!!!

Kati*na and I are still in Haiti.....

2007-09-16T08:40:00.000-07:00

....thanks to red tape and a battle of words. Friday at 7:00 a.m. we had our visa appointment. That was the best appointment we could get because USCIS did not send our file and approval over to the Consulate until Wednesday, Sept. 12 (Even though our appt. with them was on Sept 6!!). Knowing this, we made several phone calls on Wednesday trying to arrange our appointment for Thursday.

We arrived at the Consulate at 6:00 a.m. on Friday morning and waited outside the gate until 7:00 a.m. THEN, we waited inside the Embassy until 8:45 a.m. before the Officer at the Consulate talked with us, all the while, sweating bullets because our flight was at 11:05 a.m.

Basically, the court document that Katiana's father and mother signed in January of 2005 had the words "irrevocably and unconditionally" in the margin and the officer was uncertain of the date that those words were added. The Haitian court did approve the document and they also affixed their seal in three places on this document, one of which was just below this text in the margin. Later, the attorney did confirm to us this is why the court stamped their seal on the document in this place. But the officer at the consulate said he was uncertain of the dates the words were added and he wasn't sure the birth parents understood they were "irrevocably AND unconditionally" relinquishing their rights (as opposed to just simply...."unconditionally" relinquishing their rights) Ok....I just deleted my next thought because it isn't very nice......but give me a break!

We are trapped in the cross-fire of "people" arguing if her father really meant to relinquish his rights. The most simple fix would have been for us to leave right then, pick up her father, bring him to the consulate and have the officer ASK HIM! Because, CLEARLY, HE understands and the words the *powers to be* want to use don't matter to HIM! AND CLEARLY, I have developed a heated attitude about the process of adoption in Haiti! AND even more.....I'm ticked that we made it through a very long process.....made an effort to make it a special homecoming and a special week by bringing Steven and Marisa with us.....and right up to the last minute we had anxiety about the very thing that DID HAPPEN!

Some would say we have the worst of luck! I say, we are stronger and we all experienced this difficult process TOGETHER which will give us all a common bond in the future. And while it may appear that Satan is "stirring the pot" I AM MEAN ENOUGH to take his crap and the LORD knows me....and what motivates me... AND....I will do my best to raise hell about this process for others adopting from Haiti! I can not change Haiti and the hardships that add to the slow process......but I SHOULD have a voice in my own country and I'm spitting mad at the lack of cooperation USCIS and the VISA Office have with each other. WHY? And....what can one person do about it? God willing, ONE person CAN make a change....but many can make a quicker change - so for those of you enduring this same process - start writing your Senators and Congressmen/women!!! The system in Haiti is broken but the system in the U.S. shouldn't be!

Ok.....Hopefully, the resolution to this problem will be sent in a memo on Monday and we will get her visa and come home. In my frustration, I contacted everyone I knew who could shake things up and try to help us. I do hope we have an answer tomorrow! AND....thank you to all of you who lit up the phones on our behalf!

Most of all, thank you for your prayers....

Quick update...

2007-09-12T17:19:00.000-07:00

Sorry...no time for a fun picture. We could use everyones prayers! We don't have an official appointment tomorrow for Katiana's visa yet and it is Wednesday night 7:20 p.m.

We have been in contact with them and we are hopeful they will work us in to their schedule tomorrow...but they just rec'd approval from DHS today and they have not yet reviewed our file.

I have Senator Bennett's office contacting them as well as Holt in Eugene.

We will be leaving the Kaliko at 6:00 a.m. so we can arrive early at the consulate!

Pray we can all come home as a family as planned on Friday!

Love you all!
tash

Donations...

2007-09-11T15:04:00.000-07:00

I'm typing fast because I lost one post already...I know I won't be able to properly express what I witnessed on Saturday morning when we opened the donations. First we turned the Village into a *musical village* when we handed out plastic recorders to all the children! Mark kept apologizing to Monsour and all the caretakers for that. It WAS pretty "musical"! But one at a time a few of the plastic instruments bit the dust because the kids used them to beat on the concrete walls too! They had fun and that is what counts!

Then we (most of the house moms, Monsour, Mark, Marisa, Katiana and me with children running in and out) all packed into the small office with our 7 large pieces of luggage and went through them! Wow, I had the camera in hand and the noise level turned to excitement by all the caregivers when they realized there was new clothing and shoes for them too! It was amazing to see their excitement! I think they really loved getting the new items for the children BUT I THINK....they were SURPRISED to find new things for them too! It really was a very sweet moment. THANK YOU ALL who helped with money or items or prayers! We really made a difference!

Monday adventure...

2007-09-11T14:32:00.000-07:00

Monday morning Monsour called us to tell us we needed to leave right away for Port-au-Prince because Katiana had to have her medical exam completed. The message I received from Mark was we needed to get there before noon because they would need to draw blood and it would take three days before the results would be ready! It was already 9:45 a.m. and it would take us at least an hour and a half to get to Pap from the Kaliko.

So my nature to worry about "details" like test results getting to the consulate by Thursday....so we could have her interview and actually ALL get on the plane on Friday began to kick in.

ADD......the drive into Pap. Not exactly like merging on the 405 freeway...instead, take the blue Ford Explorer designed to seat 5 and put 3 extra people in the back (Steven, Marisa and Katiana) and drive at freeway speed on a road barely wide enough for two vehicles... and of course, don't forget all the pot holes we must come to a screaching halt for (OR just swerve around them at freeway speeds while passing all the slower trucks, busses, cars and motorbikes) AND...seeing overloaded busses that are doing the same thing (**PICTURE THIS...a top heavy bus - because it has a roof loaded with burlap sacks full of *who knows what* and THEN on top of the sacks PEOPLE! YES, PEOPLE on top of the busses which drive at freeway speeds COMING AT YOU and swerving around pot holes! It is a scene my brain is still trying to process! I had the middle seat on the back bench and a great view of everything coming at us! Well, making the drive between the Kaliko and Pap ALWAYS sends my brain into a place of trying to understand the differences in the laws that govern *my world* and those that rule here in Haiti.

We made it to the clinic at noon! Monsour did a little sweet talking to get her in quicker and then he explained to me that we would still have the required papers by Thursday for our appointment. He then asked me (nervously - because he didn't tell me to bring them when he called) if I had our tax forms (which I did! To Mark's surprise I AM organized). He was so happy because he needed our documents so he could submit our file to the consulate. Of course as I write this....it is now Tuesday afternoon and the DHS office still has not sent our dossier over to the consulate!!! I'm steaming about that because the consulate needs our dossier before they can set our appointment! So WE NEED our appointment to be on THURSDAY and that is only two days away! back to worrying about those *little* details! NO this isn't much of a vacation! Although, we are all thoroughly enjoing our beautiful new daughter! She is a gem!

OH... back to the car....NO AIR CONDITIONING! Ha, ha, ha.....Marisa, Steven and Katiana were all covered in black soot by the end of our round trip adventure to Pap and back! The windows were all down and the back window was lifted to keep the air flowing! OF COURSE, the air was filled with black diesel fumes and smoke from the burning trash along the way. Our breathing became shallow and we (Mark and I) were on the verge of *tossing our cookies* (that was for you dad! because I know you just read that and grimaced because of my choice of words! :) ...we didn't loose anything but maybe a pound or two because our lunch was cheese crackers and we returned just in time to see the Kaliko cleaning up after the lunch crowd! SO...we had to wait until 7:30 for dinner! OH....and Marisa had a black face as she sat closest to the open window in the back and Mark had *wings* from the wind and soot in his hair! We all laughed that we probably just lost at least 6 months off our lives because of our road trip and the fumes we inhaled! I guess we could've been on a tap tap.....so we are grateful for the little blue Ford Explore and the fact that we didn't get a flat tire or CRASH along the way!

The picture of the Ford explore was actually taken when we were giving Katiana's father and sister their gifts.

The Kaliko...

2007-09-11T14:10:00.000-07:00

...has a beautiful beach! Of course, we are spending most of our time in the pool or in the room because it is sooooo hot! Hot has been re-defined for all of us to include a constant state of sticky and the word "stinky" comes to mind too! Saturday we had Katiana with her 5 friends until 6:00 p.m. at the Kaliko with us. We swam in the pool and watch the girls just have fun together.

Sunday we didn't do much of anything! Steven, Marisa and I weren't feeling all that great. So we pretty much napped, read and ate the day away.

We are having a great time with Katiana. She is so anxious to learn. Marisa is doing a great job teaching her already. They both do some funny things....like inspect each bite of food before it goes in their mouth! Marisa has always done this and we noticed Katiana does the same thing! Maybe it is just a teenage girl kind of thing to do?

HI ZACHARY AND MICHAEL!!! WE LOVE YOU and MISS YOU!!!

As promised...

2007-09-11T14:02:00.000-07:00

...here is a picture of Steven being a good sport when Katiana and her friends braided his hair! They all laughed at him when they were finished and said he "looked like a girrrl". Too funny! The braids only made it through the night (while in the room). It was back to normal (wild and curly) by breakfast because Steven claimed "it hurt".

Things are going GREAT so far...

2007-09-08T10:57:00.000-07:00

WELL....as I said in our first post....we were successful at the DHS office. I will try to describe the 3 hour experience we will remember as our DHS experience in Haiti. First, the DHS office is staffed with Haitians - we didn't meet a single American in the DHS (U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security) office. Monsour said they contract the work out to the Haitian gov't. Of course, there are Americans overseeing the office but we didn't meet them. In fact, I didn't interview with anyone at all. Mark answered a few questions and they interviewed Katiana and her birth father. SO....we sat most of the time in the waiting room which is similar to the USCIS office in the U.S. with a T.V. blarring the movie Lamumba. Ok, go and do your research and you will see - the movie alone made us feel uncomfortable. AND...we had Katiana's birth father and older sister sitting behind us in the waiting room. I wanted to ask them so many questions but the movie was so obnoxious and basically it was just overwhelming and awkward. We did ask a few questions with Monsour translating but we hoped to have a nicer place to visit.

After the interview was finished we had some gifts to give her father and sister....but I told Monsour I just couldn't do it with the "now playing" Haitian soap opera (totally cheesy) in the stinky little waiting room. Monsour didn't want us to look through our luggage on the street so we drove to his wife's work at the U.S.Aid office. We all had to get out of the car so they could search the car. We drove in thinking Francois would follow us - but they waited outside. We gathered our gifts and drove back out and presented them through the car window. Pictures for her father and earings and lotion for her sister. The experience didn't match the vision I had of this moment.... Oh well - when does that ever happen anyway? One surprise was when we walked out of the DHS office and we took these photos......Katiana's father came and gathered all of us together for a group hug. It was very sweet. It is beyond my ability to understand the world he lives in that makes him happy at this moment.

I will post more later....look forward to a picture of Steven with his hair braided....our first picture on the Kaliko beach ...and some more cute pics of all of us but for NOW.....we need to eat some FINE Haitian Cuisine at the world famous Kaliko Beach Club!

Love you all...
Tash, Mark, Steven, Marisa AND Katiana

oh...actually, Francois just told us they had some food for us here at the Fontana Village....of course we had to look up in the dictionary what he said we were eating....something like Taro root soup bouillion....hmmmmm soup in HAITI??? Maybe they think it is COLD today???

more with the little kids...

2007-09-08T10:13:00.000-07:00

We have lots of fun pictures with Marie and Roberto....but downloading the pictures to my blog is painfully slow here in Haiti....

Hopefully the last two pics will publish. We have been waiting for 15 minutes.

Leaving the little ones was sad. Marie and Roberto know when we begin to pack things up....they begin to get quiet again. Hopefully our next trip to Haiti we will pack THEM up with us!

If the pic's make it....they are of Marisa and Roberto and Steven and Marie looking a little sad.

Catching up in Haiti...

2007-09-08T09:53:00.000-07:00

We arrived in Haiti on Wednesday, Sept. 5 ON TIME! Everything went well which translates ALL OF OUR LUGGAGE arrived with us! Of course we were all a bit sleepy because we took the red-eye flight from L.A. Marisa and I learned from our last trip so we brought sweatshirts and pillows and slept on the floor in Fort Lauderdale.

We arrived at the El Rancho Hotel and had about 45 minutes before Richard and Charlemagne brought Marie-Vierge and Roberto to us. When they arrived we invited them to stay for lunch. The kids were VERY quiet.

We ate and the guys left and we got right to having some fun....swimming in the pool! Here are a few pictures of all of us together. Marie and Roberto became all smiles very soon.

We made it!

2007-09-06T16:51:00.000-07:00

Yeah! We made it to Haiti! Today was our DHS appointment and they did NOT require DNA testing....YEAH!!! One more step and Katiana will for sure be on the airplane with all of us!

We experienced a new HOT today driving around Port-au-Prince with Steven, Katiana, Me and Marisa all jammed in the back seat made for three! It gives a new meaning to the word "bonding" ....we thought we would all fall out and be stuck at the hip forever!

We will try to post some fun pictures tomorrow. Danielle.....sorry I forgot but is the necklace for Maxilia or Rosemonde?? Please post a comment and let us know. oh...and the shows were a huge hit with Monsour! :)

Cheers everyone! We are having a blast and Katiana is as cute as can be!!! So were Marie and Roberto.....to little time with them though.

Love you all....
Tash, Mark, Steven, Marisa AND Katiana

We are GOING to HAITI!!!

2007-08-27T16:42:00.000-07:00

Finally...we have plane tickets to go back to Haiti! It took me the entire day to purchase our tickets. Something weird was going on with flights changing right before my eyes! Because the flights were coming up different every time we did a search (and this was even happening for our travel agent) we started checking a later date which was going to require changing our Visa appointment. When I called our agency about changing the appointment I realized we may have to wait even longer if we didn't just try to work with our Sept. 6th appointment. SO.....I went back to looking for airfare on the 4th. At this point our travel agent had gone to lunch. So, I did a quick search on my own at Mobissimo.com and found GREAT tickets!!! Of course, I knew I needed to buy "K's" ticket to match ours on the return flight.....so I called and had Cheaptickets stay on the phone with me as I purchased our tickets....then the agent *planned* to assist me in purchasing "K's" ticket......well, she wasn't able to book the ticket and told me I would have to contact the airline directly. After going back and forth between American Airlines, Delta and Cheaptickets several times......they finally called American for me. Apparently, American Airlines didn't recognize the Delta portion of our tickets until Cheaptickets called both airlines (basically they repeated all my calls) to confirm they were REAL flights and could be booked! So.....lets just say, I will never be able to listen to the celebrated "Canon in D" by Pachelbel ever again without memories of 45 minutes of it playing over and over and over as I was sweating bullets about getting "K" on our flight!

THE GOOD NEWS....we are going to Haiti on Tuesday, September 4 and returning Friday, September 14 *WITH* Katian*a!!!

Please pray for us....the last wild card is the possibility of the U.S. wanting DNA testing. We don't think this will happen....but I'm nervous because so much HAS happened with our effort in bringing "K" home.

ONE MORE WEEK!!! I can't believe it!

Amazing friends!

2007-08-21T16:51:00.000-07:00

LOOK at my living room! We certainly have some amazing friends! We have 80 pairs of brand new shoes to take with us to Haiti, 28 *new* sheet sets and lots of cute *new* clothes! ON TOP of everything, we received another $500 donation from our friends at Photo Express in Canada http://photoexpress.typepad.com/scrapblog/2007/08/sponsor-a-shoe-.html Wow! We are overwhelmed by our generous friends and family. Thank you all for your support! Our friends in Haiti will be so excited and we will be sure to take lots of photos to share with all of you!

Beside myself with EXCITEMENT!!!

2007-08-21T15:34:00.000-07:00

TODAY I received a wonderful phone call from our agency!!! The best one yet!!! KATIAN*A HAS A PRINTED PASSPORT!!!!! I can't believe I could be back on this beach as soon as next week sharing this beautiful view with my daughter Katian*a!!! We have all worked so hard for this day to arrive! Katian*a has had a challenging week too and we have been praying for her. She attended her mothers funeral just two days ago. Today, I'm sure she got the news that she actually has a passport. What an emotional rollercoaster this has been! We are so excited and when Mike asked when the soonest day was that we could travel....I had to actually call him back. It took me 30 minutes for his request to actually set in.

We wouldn't know what to do without a glitch....so even the good news comes with a little glitch. We will wait until Friday to set the DHS appointment because there is a spelling error on the death certificate that needs correcting. Because of this little error - Monsour will have to make a 6 hour drive back to the court. He plans to do that tomorrow and hopefully by Friday we will have a date to meet with DHS !!! which could be as soon as next Thursday!!! WOW!!! At any rate, we WILL be traveling to Haiti very soon.....so I have much to do!

YEAH!!!!!!!!! It is a happy day and it is also my BIRTHDAY! What a great birthday present.....and the funny thing, my good friend Polly told me yesterday (after hearing me complain about how slow this was all going) "don't worry, tomorrow is your birthday and you will get her passport for your birthday." SHE WAS RIGHT!!! I wish I could describe the thoughts that went through my mind when I saw HOLT calling --- I did think of Polly's prediction and the moment I heard the cheeriness in Mike's voice I KNEW we had her passport!!! :)

if you believe in prayer...

2007-08-12T16:19:00.000-07:00

...please pray for our sweet "K" who will learn tomorrow morning that her birth mother passed away last Wednesday.

...please pray that we will be able to be with her soon. After 4 weeks we are still waiting for her passport to be printed and now we will have to obtain her birth mothers death certificate before "K" can get her VISA.

My mother heart is full as I try to take on her pain. I am praying she will be comforted and find peace about her mothers passing.

GREAT News!!!

2007-08-02T09:55:00.000-07:00

We found out last Thursday that MV and R's files were signed out of IBESR!!! This is GREAT news! As we have learned with K's file, making progress with Haitian adoptions is close to molasses going uphill! Well, progress DOES happen but certainly in a different time zone - perhaps one that doesn't really exist in any other place than the Caribbean. Mark calls it Kolob time.

Anyway, we are thrilled things are moving for our files - all of them! We are STILL WAITING for K's passport to be printed. Hopefully we will hear about that soon so we can plan our trip to Haiti.

Speaking of our trip to Haiti....THANK YOU to all who have donated and are planning on donating shoes, clothing and bed sheets. Some have asked if used items are okay. YES!!! Like new would be best. If we are overwhelmed with donations ;) we will save some to donate to Foyer de Sion when we travel again to Haiti to bring home MV and R.

We also found out American Airlines is lifting their luggage embargo on August 12. This will allow us to take extra luggage. Each extra suitcase will cost $80 and over weight luggage will cost $25. I'm not fond of asking for money but if you feel inclined... we would use it for this.

Thanks to all who have already sent donations!!!

HELP if you can...

2007-07-20T17:41:00.000-07:00

Hi Friends and Family!

FINALLY!
The time has come! In our preparation to bring "K" home we requested information from Monsour about the "needs" they have at the Holt Fontana Village. Here is his reply.

"We have twenty five children at the village 11 boys and 14 girls. We have 4 male caretakers and 14 females. Things that we really need are: Sheets, tennis shoes/ sneakers and clothes. We will be very grateful if we can get these items."

I am always amazed at the beautiful and humble spirit of my friends in Haiti. I feel compelled to quote a scripture that came to my mind when I read his very humble list. It is in Mosiah 4:26 (if you haven't read the Book of Mormon you can click on this link to receive a free one.) http://www.mormon.org/

Mosiah 4:26 "And now, for the sake of these things which I have spoken unto you--that is, for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God--I would that ye should impart of your substance to the poor, everyman according to that which he hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants."

Some time ago, Mark pointed out the last word of this verse to me. It says "wants" - not "needs" but "wants". Perhaps you can ponder that and share your insight with me. In an effort to be true to a prompting, I shared this scripture that has moved me in the past – certainly I am not wishing to “guilt” anyone into helping. If you can, we would appreciate it – if you can’t we understand.

I will add to Monsour's list a few things and explain.

14 watches for women (I have 10 watches already – THANKS Jeni!)
4 watches for men
WHY: Because one of the caretakers asked me for my watch when I was in Haiti last year and we would like to give each of the caretakers this gift.

Adult shoes
4 men's sturdy sandals size 9 ½, 10, 10 and 10 ½
14 women’s comfortable sandals size 7 ½ - 9 ½
WHY: Because Mark was asked for his sandals last year while in Haiti.

Sheets (24 twin size sets and 6 full size)
Tennis shoes for children all sizes (mostly children ages 2-9)
Clothing (remember it is HOT in Haiti)
WHY: Because these are the items on Monsour’s list.

Look for quality shoes and clothing on clearance – I found girls tennis shoes for $7.48 at Target and my sister, Jeni found boys tennis shoes for $3.24!!! Yeah!

Because this is a very public blog I will post the address of our business as a place to send any of the above mentioned items. If it is easier to send a gift card or cash I will be shopping at Target and Wal-Mart for the above mentioned items. Here is a picture of Haiti's version of Wal-Mart!

Few people realize the cost of things in Haiti. While the majority of Haitians live on $1.oo a day a can of Formula is $30.00. A gallon of gas cost around $6.00 last year when we were in Haiti. Our hotel accommodations and two meals were $130.00 per day. Things are just not as “cheap” as most people assume. So taking supplies purchased here is far better than going with cash in hand. If we are overwhelmed with donations :) we will use the cash donations to pay the airline fees to take additional luggage. Please send donations by August 7th.

Thanks to all in advance who would like to help! It is a beautiful thing to see the children in an orphanage receive something as simply as a new pair of shoes! You can be sure pictures of that will make it to this blog when we return home!

Here is our address:
QuicKutz, Inc.
1365 West 1250 South
Suite 100
Orem, UT 84058
Please mark your box or envelope *Haiti donation*
Here is our website if you are interested in reading about our Kids from Haiti cookbook project.
http://www.quickutz.com/

Thanks a million!

FREEDOM!!!!

2007-07-16T14:14:00.000-07:00

Well......today I received a surprise phone call from our agency!!! I was setting myself up over the week-end for "no news" until Wednesday. I was also preparing myself for another lame excuse in an attempt to protect myself from another disappointment!

BUT INSTEAD we received GOOD NEWS!!! YES....HER FILE WAS SIGNED OUT OF THE MOI OFFICE!!!

That means she is coming home in AUGUST or early SEPTEMBER!!! WAHOO!!!

"K" we love you........and can't wait for you to come home!

who is the puppet?

2007-07-13T15:58:00.000-07:00

Well. Today I had my hopes up that our file would be signed out of the MOI office in Haiti. Hope was built because the message communicated to me on Wednesday night at 6:00 p.m. was - the MOI office requested copies of our passports. They told Monsour (the orphanage director) that was the last thing they needed before they could sign our file and asked him to comeback on Friday.

Of course.....today is Friday and not only did Monsour return to the MOI office, he returned 45 minutes before they opened and waited. He spent four hours waiting! The waiting only led to the assistant in charge telling him "he didn't have time for him" and he would have to "come back next Wednesday".

So, I'm feeling a little like a puppet. I'm certain Monsour is also feeling like a puppet - jumping through all the hoops set in front of him. We have seen this kind of thing before. Monsour made complicated arrangements to have K's birthparents taken to PaP for an interview with the assistant at the civil court. When they arrived, they were told that person (who requested Monsour to return on THAT day) decided to take the day off. During our 4.5 months wait in the civil court we also had to wonder about our file ever getting signed out because the court was actually broken into and vandalized. Hmmm, I guess a few local Haitians were also frustrated that the officials of this court weren't doing their job!

So........Who is the real puppet? AND who is the puppeteer? As I ponder this I realize it isn't me, it isn't all the other families in the same position we are in, it isn't all the orphanage directors and agencies involved in trying to help children find families, it certainly isn't all the children. The master puppeteer in this mess is Satan himself! So, were does that leave the eejits in the MOI office - yep they are HIS puppets. It is so blantantly obvious. As they push their agendas thinking all along they are their own agendas, they are blinded (or not) because really they are pushing the agenda of one evil force who has them all balled up in their own pride and decieved by "their own power" which allows them to speak rudely and callously to the orphanage directors, which gives them the "right" to hold up hundreds of children from leaving Haiti to be with their families who have legally adopted them, which keeps hundreds of children from receiving care in the orphanages that are filled. Yes, power does corrupt and Satan will use it to deceive and make puppets out of those lacking character and compassion.

Perhaps, the slimy old devil himself has won another small battle as our file rots away, being held hostage in the MOI office - BUT he will not win the war! For I KNOW who is on my side - and He has the power to wrest my file from the beastly grip of that slimy one at just the right time. So........we will wait until next Wednesday. And probably we will wait again. But our sweet K - who is such an amazing young girl WILL come home and the battles we have fought will make our being together in the future all the sweeter!

This is "R"

2007-07-03T09:57:00.000-07:00

This is R. He is 6 years old and M's younger brother. The first picture was taken May 2006 on our first trip to Haiti. The picture of him in his blue checked shirt was taken last January. R is a very sweet little boy. He isn't too fond of having his picture taken so we had to be a bit sneaky to get some good ones. He LOVES candy! I miss him very much!

This is "MV"

2007-07-03T09:46:00.000-07:00

This is MV. She is 7. The first picture was taken last May 2006 when we first met. The picture of her in the blue checked dress was taken last January 2007. MV is sweet, fiesty and funny all wrapped in one! She for sure will keep us busy when she comes home! I miss her very much!

this is "K"

2007-07-03T09:26:00.000-07:00

This is K. She is 13 years old. The picture of her in her blue school uniform was taken in September 2006. The second picture is K having fun with M on the first day we met her in Haiti May 2006. K is such a beautiful young lady. She has an amazing and sweet spirit about her. We will all be blessed to have her as a daughter and sister! We miss her so very much!

our family...

2007-07-03T09:08:00.000-07:00

Here we are December 2006. Looking forward to our next family picture in December 2007 and wondering... if we will have our kids from Haiti home.

A new blog......

2007-07-02T11:20:00.000-07:00

Hi we are the Hixon family of six soon to be nine! This blog is dedicated to sharing information about our experience as we work to bring home our three beautiful children from Haiti.

We are still waiting for K's passport and expect we will be traveling to Haiti soon. Hopefully we will return to Haiti towards the end of 2007 or early 2008 to bring home MV and R.

We will use this blog to update friends and family about our children in Haiti, the process and hopefully soon, our trips to Haiti.

Our adoption story...

2007-06-30T14:14:00.000-07:00

June 11, 2005 Mark and I found ourselves at Outback restaurant enjoying a late evening dinner after a busy Saturday full of running errands. We were busy running errands because we had been called to be a “Ma and Pa” for our church youth group who would be pushing handcarts on a reenactment of a pioneer trek. It was a huge undertaking with about 300 people involved. I would need to write separately about this experience because it was quite amazing.

Saturday night as we finally made it to dinner, we knew we only had four days before we were to spend the following Thursday, Friday and Saturday with our “family” of eight youth between the ages of 14 and 18 hauling a handcart up the mountain. The preparation for this event caused me to feel a bit anxious. Anxiety over being the Ma to eight children I didn’t really know. I also knew this could be an amazing and spiritual experience and I felt responsible for the young people in our “family” to really catch the spirit of this event. I’m sure my natural opposition to any form of camping was also adding to my anxiety – I have always expressed my “idea” of camping as a Marriott Hotel on the beach!

Why do I begin my adoption story with the events of a pioneer trek? Well, I believe the Lord works using little experiences that build upon each other to guide our hearts. Individual experiences do not always drive action; however, some experiences happen in a certain order at precisely the right moment to touch our hearts. Many of those experiences had been building for both Mark and I over 20+ years of marriage. In fact, my first known experience that suggested I would adopt was when I was a teenager. I was visiting my grandmother who had an amazing doll collection. She would buy dolls at second hand stores and clean them up and crochet new clothing for them. On this day she was restoring a cute little black doll. She commented to me how she loved little black babies. Instantly a thought flashed through my mind that someday I might adopt a little baby like that. Being only 13 or 14 years old I found it odd as being “old and married” seemed to be the last thing on my mind let alone being a mother! However, it was one of those experiences that stuck. I also remember thinking about the one black student in our school. Perhaps there were others, but I only remember one in my grade. He was on the football team and hung out with the popular kids. I wasn’t popular. But what I remember about him was he was always very kind to me. He wasn’t like most of the other popular kids. He impressed me. I’m sure this too was one of the little experiences the Lord intended for me.

As we sat in the restaurant finishing up our meal, we noticed the waiters rearranging the tables to accommodate about twenty people! We initially thought a sports team was coming in to celebrate together. What happened next is difficult to describe. It wasn’t a sports team, it was a family. Yes a single family of twenty! I recognized them from our community. I had read about them previously. They were a family of mixed children, children born to the parents and children adopted internationally. Of course, we weren’t in any hurry to leave and this family was quite a site. They were absolutely beautiful and I was in a trance watching how the mother organized all the children into their seats and helped get the drink order in. My heart was touched immediately as I had that feeling of holding back uninvited tears, I looked over and my eyes made contact with a little boy with beautiful dark eyes and dark skin (later I found out he was born in Africa). He smiled at me and it was all over trying to hold back the tears. At first, I couldn’t believe I was sitting there crying and I tried to hide it from Mark and our server. After only a moment, I noticed Mark was touched too as he sat observing this family with an amazing look of interest on his face. I decided it was no use hiding my tears from him but I did try to conceal them from the server who just brought us a “to go” box. As we sat slowly picking at our leftovers we continued to watch this family. One of their little girls started playing a little game with me. She was more to my back and I guess I had turned and made eye contact with her. Then Mark told me that she wants me to look at her, so I turned around and looked at her and she hid behind her chair. We played back and forth for several minutes, as I tried to “catch” her before she could hide. All the while this little voice inside me told me I needed to talk to the mother of this family. Then the logical argument would flare up – leave her alone, let her eat her dinner in peace. This argument went on, back and forth until the feeling was so strong it moved me out of my chair and over to where she was sitting. I approached her and commented “are all of these your children?” to which she replied “yes”. I told her I thought her family was beautiful. Next, I told her we were touched by their family and it reminded us of little feelings we had had over the years that made us think we too might adopt someday. She gave me the address of an internet chat group that she belonged to for families who had adopted internationally. I thanked her and felt peace about “bothering” her.

We went home and immediately began doing a little research. The first thing Mark and I did was go to the chat group this lady referred us to and completed the steps to join. At the bottom of the page for this group was an advertisement for Holt International. We clicked on the link and began learning about the process of international adoption. As we clicked around their website we came to a page that had a photo listing of children from several countries waiting for a family. The last country was listed as “Caribbean”. There were seven or eight children listed of which four were older girls. Looking at the pictures of the older girls Mark and I almost without words communicated that “we could do this”………then “we should do this”! These feelings sparked so much energy inside of me…..as if I had stumbled on something so amazing that had been lost.

This all made sense as I looked back on the beginning months of 2005, I found myself having “lost” feelings as I would pray. I felt something big was missing in my life. I remember having thoughts that I was missing something but I just couldn’t put my finger on it. I specifically remember in January of 2005 thinking I should be more satisfied with what I had, and why was I feeling this “lost, missing” feeling. In February we began to plan a family vacation. We decided as a family to travel to the Dominican Republic. Mark had spent time in the DR when he was younger and we had previously visited the Caribbean. It wasn’t a difficult decision to travel again to the Caribbean. I guess almost anyone would agree it is a beautiful place. So in April of 2005 we set off for our week vacation with all our children. It was a wonderful time and we loved that our children had the opportunity to visit another country. During our vacation we thought little about the fact that the DR shared the island of Hispaniola with the country of Haiti. At that time we lived in blissful ignorance about the extreme poverty we would soon come to know on the other side of this beautiful paradise.

Well, I digress. I will return to our night at the computer – June 11, 2005. The feelings that were going through me as I looked at “K’s” picture and read about her are almost indescribable. I remember without thought as we looked over the pictures of all the children, coming to a picture of a little girl who was about seven years old, about the age of our youngest biological child and I blurted out “we will adopt again”. To that Mark gave me a surprised look and in my head this thought came so strongly “what about the little boy”. WELL, I didn’t blurt out that thought to Mark instead I just responded in my mind – “if the Lord wants me to have another little boy He will have to drop him in my lap”. Feeling very satisfied that – that answered that! I left the thought right were it came from – and didn’t “bother” Mark with it.

That night an excitement had come over me. Something inside me knew we had opened a door that was meant for us. The feelings were so strong and convincing I had a hard time sleeping. The next morning was Sunday and instead of getting ready for church I went right to the computer. I had to go see “K’s” picture again and read again the few paragraphs of information describing her. Mark came downstairs and we called "M" to the computer. We asked her to look at the page with all the children’s photos. She gave me a bit of a perplexed look and I asked her “what if one of these girls was your sister?” "M" immediately became excited and then quickly, she became serious and said “Mom, really, are you serious?” Her voice seemed to reflect concern that maybe I was just teasing. I told her I was serious and daddy and I felt strongly that we should adopt another child. She allowed herself to become excited again when she realized we were shooting straight with her. Of course, it was Sunday so we couldn’t contact the agency to find out more about adopting “K”. So we turned our attention to getting ourselves ready and off to church for the day.

On Monday, I contacted Holt. They were amazing and answered all of my questions several times through-out the week. We had also joined the international chat group and began communicating with others about adopting from Haiti. One of the members of the group worked for an orphanage in Haiti called Foyer de Sion. She told me they were having a reunion for families who had adopted from Haiti in Boise Idaho in a week and a half. I didn’t think much about it because we were preparing to go on the pioneer trek. My mind was full of wonder about adding to our family, the week-end ahead “trekking” with a bunch of teenagers and hoping to help them catch the spirit of our ancestors who sacrificed so much as they crossed the plains for religious freedom.

Thursday morning came and a funny note about preparing for the Trek the night before was how we “lost” our little dog Maggie. Maggie is a Chihuahua and pretty small. I was crazy busy trying to get all our stuff together because we were to meet at the church at 6:00 a.m. the next morning. In all my busyness, I noticed Maggie wasn’t following me around like usual. So I asked the kids to try and find her. No one could find her. So I began searching, going through the house calling her name. We couldn’t fend her anywhere. Then we began searching the yard and neighborhood. We searched by foot and by car asking people if they had seen her. Finally after searching for about three hours and feeling frustrated because now I was behind getting ready. I broke down and cried. I told Mark I couldn’t just leave the next morning wondering where she was! Just then "M" came running downstairs with Maggie in her arms. She had crawled into the linen closet when I was putting clean towels away! So, I was very relieved that she wasn’t lost and I went on to finishing up our packing. So much for getting to bed at a reasonable time!

One of the new feelings I had going into the trek was knowledge that I would be participating in an amazing opportunity and no doubt the spirit would be strong coupled with the effort of the trek itself and the beauty of the mountains. I prayed that I might find answers to the questions that had been presented the week-end before concerning our family adopting and concerning the child we would adopt. I didn’t mention it earlier for simplicity of writing but initially we requested the information for three of the girls listed to be sent to us. Two of them were eleven and the other seven. I knew this event would provide some time for me to reflect and pray. I also knew it would allow me to be close to the spirit as we served the youth in our pioneer family. The last day, our stake president (our local church leader) gave an uplifting talk to the entire group about following Christ. In his words I found an answer that still causes me to tear up just thinking about it. The spirit was so strong that his message was my answer as I had been praying that something would touch my heart and confirm our direction. Here are the words that touched my heart – a quote from Gordon B. Hinckley, 1996. “I am grateful that today none of our people are stranded on the Wyoming highlands. But I know that all about us there are many who are in need of help and who are deserving of rescue. Our mission in life, as followers of the Lord Jesus Christ, must be a mission of saving. There are the homeless, the hungry, the destitute. We have done much. We can do more to help those who live on the edge of survival… It is not those on the high plains of Wyoming that we need to be concerned with today. It is with many immediately around us, in our families, in our wards and stakes, in our neighborhoods and communities… If we are to build that Zion of which the prophets have spoken and of which the Lord has given mighty promise, we must set aside our consuming selfishness. We must rise above our love for comfort and ease, and in the very process of effort and struggle, even in our extremity, we shall become better acquainted with our God.”

For me, these words rang true that the steps we were taking pleased the Lord. That proceeding to adopt one of the young girls we had found on the Holt website was in fact the right thing for our family and for the child we would come to know as ours. Little did I know it would take us two plus years of effort and struggle to bring our children home!

The trek was now over and the files from Holt came in the mail. I followed up with my new e-mails from the new group I had joined and found an invitation to the Boise reunion from Crystal who was the adoption coordinator for Foyer de Sion. We didn’t think we could pull off a quick trip to Idaho on such late notice, especially being the very next week-end. By Wednesday we had changed our minds and decided that we should go. Quickly we made arrangements for our children and Mark and I left on Friday for Boise. While in Boise, we enjoyed meeting all of the families and seeing all of the children they had adopted. It was such fun! At this reunion I met another friend that I continue to keep in touch with. When we met the two of us struggled to figure out where we had met before. We went back and forth trying to identify a place we could have possibly met and came up short. We have been friends over the past two years and on many occasions we have helped each other find comfort in the long process we are both going through. She is also adopting and we both have been trying to get our children home now for two years! Anyway, two other things stood out to me. First, before we left, I asked "M" to pray about which of the two older girls we should adopt. Neither one of us felt qualified to make that decision alone. So, I told her she had the right to some inspiration about this decision because it was “her” sister. The other thing that stood out to me was a young boy at the reunion. He was about "MA's" age (10) and had a cute resemblance to "MA". At least his personality seemed to be similar as I watched this young boy throughout the day. Something about him captivated me. As things were wrapping up for the day, I commented to Crystal (who was responsible for child referrals for Foyer de Sion) that if she could find me a little boy just like him – as I pointed to this boy – I would adopt him! She smiled and said “I’m sure I can”. I then told her that I knew we would adopt again someday and that we would probably be talking in the future. Well, my heart had decided on the drive to Boise which girl was right for us to adopt as Mark and I talked about both of them. I was now excited to get home and question "M" about her feelings. When we arrived home it was very late so I had to wait until the next morning to speak with her. It was Sunday morning and everyone was getting ready for church. I walked into "M’s" room and asked her if she received an answer. "M" and I both felt sad about the responsibility of this “decision”. It just didn’t seem right and so she began to speak without confidence…..finally, I said quickly with a tone of urgency, “M", just tell me the girls name that is in your heart” and she blurted out “K!” So our feelings were united. After talking together as a family we decided to do what it took to adopt "K".

While in the process of gathering our information for our homestudy (which is a document written up by a social worker as the foundation for our dossier which basically outlines every detail about us as individuals, parents and as a family) and our dossier, I had two very unique experiences that lead me to question beginning a second adoption before we had completed the first one. Both experiences led me to other organizations who emphatically communicated it wasn’t possible. Both of these organizations told me the same information about the rules as pertaining to the Haitian government requiring our first child was home before we could begin the process to adopt again. But I continued to have a strong feeling that we had another little girl. Each time I would ponder this, the question “what about the little boy” would enter my mind. Feelings about the little girl were so strong I couldn’t leave it alone. On November 4, 2005 I sent an e-mail to Crystal at Foyer de Sion. I thought for sure I was just speaking as a friend about my strong feelings about this little girl (and perhaps the little boy) and my request to her was to keep me in mind as new children entered the orphanage. I knew Crystal had a gift for helping the children of Foyer de Sion find “their” families. All the while, I had also been “educated” by these two other organizations that convinced me I wouldn’t be able to begin a second adoption until “K” had come home anyway. So, feeling safe in communicating these feelings to Crystal I didn’t expect what happened next. She sent me some pictures of a few little girls between the ages of 3 – 6 which fit the description I had given her. AND she sent me "MV" and "R’s" pictures, along with another little boy and girl that were cousins. Immediately, my heart recognized "MV and "R". I was so startled by it. I immediately became aware of that “feeling” the same feeling I had the night we had found “K” and the thoughts of me blurting out we would adopt again and the question of the little boy……it all became so overwhelming. Just moments after the pictures came through; I received a phone call from my daughter, "M" asking me to pick her up at her friend’s house. It was a Friday night and Mark and I had planned to go out together on a date. As all the kids went their different “Friday night ways” we discovered "Z", who was seven at the time was going to be left home alone if we went out, so we stayed home. Mark watched TV while I e-mailed Crystal. Unfortunately, he left the car in the drive way instead of putting it in his garage. Our son "S" moved it up behind the two car garage when he left earlier in the evening. So when I left the computer and pushed the button to open the two car garage (thinking Mark’s car would be where it always is - in his garage) I jumped into the car while saying out loud “heaven help me” as I believe my heart recognized these two little siblings as belonging with our family and as the two little ones that had caused me to write the e-mail to Crystal to begin with. AND, as I backed out of the garage I backed right into Mark’s car! This was the beginning of a string of opposition working to keep us from committing to their adoption. I spent the next three months praying and working out the feelings inside of me about adopting "MV" and "R". All the while, Mark didn’t have strong feelings either way. I really wrestled with the feelings more than anything ever in my life. I look back now and I realize my heart knew from the beginning they belonged with our family but it would take the experience of the next three months to confirm it to my mind and to Mark. Many tender mercies were given as the Lord stretched my understanding allowing me even a small glimpse of the future which confirmed the little boy was indeed meant to be part of our family! The Lord had just dropped him in my lap! My heart knew things my mind was struggling with. The Lord so patiently walked me through a process that brought my heart and mind together. For this I find it difficult to express my gratitude with words. Windows and doors immediately began to open once we committed to adopting them. However, it did require taking a big step into the dark before we would see and experience the many things that confirmed this to us.

They were meant to be part of our family. And no matter what the world would think or say, I couldn’t risk meeting my God and answering that fear stopped me from doing that which I knew was mine to do. Adopting "MV and "R" was my responsibility – I knew that I had made commitments to them and to my God before this life. I simply couldn’t live with myself if I ignored these feelings that so moved me.

Not exactly a story that would fit in a nutshell but as condensed as I could make it. We feel such a deep sense of respect and gratitude for the privilege we have of raising all of our children. I am humbled and grateful to my Heavenly Father who led us to this place in our lives that have been so full of purpose, not without challenges, but even the trials seem to be stretching us to accomplish our responsibilities that have eternal consequences. Eternal consequences that will prove the superior blessings in store for our little family as we transition from what we were to what we are to be.